Top 20 most celebrated holidays, ranked

If there’s one thing everybody can agree on, it’s that holidays are great. Things are fractious politically all around the world and nothing seems to improve, but as humans we still have nice traditions to remind us that not everything around is a wasteland dumpster fire.

So, let’s take a look at the top 20 most celebrated holidays and forget all about our troubles.

20. Labor Day

The best thing about Labor Day is that it means you get a three-day weekend. The worst thing? Well, look into the history and you’ll realize it’s kind of a bummer. But three days off! Can’t beat that.

19. Black Friday

It’s cooled down in recent years, but there was a time when there was nothing more entertaining than watching people trample each other for $20 off a TV. Also, it’s fun!

18. Fourth of July

Independence Day fireworks are another thing we all get to share together as a society. Who doesn’t sitting on some random blanket staring up at the explosions in the sky?

17. Holi

A stunning and beautiful celebration that’s aesthetically pleasing and a whole lot of fun, as well as very holy.

16. Mother’s Day

All of us came from someone, and that someone is incredibly special to most of us. The least we can do is make a phone call. The least!

15. Easter

Hide the eggs and make memories that last forever. Anyone who did an egg hunt as a kid re it. It’s another one of those nice things we get to have as a whole, functional society.

14. Valentine’s Day

What’s wrong with a little romance? What’s wrong with a little love? Greeting card companies are people too! Kidding aside, as lame as it sounds we need holidays like this one.

13. April Fool’s Day

The one time of the year when you can mess with people and have an easy out? “Hey Bob I slept with your wife!” Then Bob gets all uppity and you hit him with the “April Fools!” and then Bob knows you “didn’t” have that affair.

12. Mardi Gras

Come for the beads, stay for the well, you know what to stay for. It’s just a fun time with lots of good food and plenty of boobs oops we mean booze.

11. Eid al-Fitr

Do you know that feeling when you haven’t eaten in forever and you have that first bite of something? Eid al-Fitr is like that but after you haven’t really eaten regularly for a month.

10. Day of the Dead

Sort of like Halloween but with basically only one costume. A beautiful way to honor ancestors and to take the time to swap anecdotes with friends and family about much-loved people who’ve departed the mortal realm.

9. Brazilian Carnival

One word: costumes. That’s putting it mildly, but this is one singular kind of party that’s fun for all the right reasons.

8. Cinco de Mayo

Sure, it’s more an American thing than a Mexican one and sure, it’s mostly a big commercial for beer and tequila, but it’s also a fun way to celebrate our Southern neighbors.

7. New Years Eve

One of the biggest parties of the year and always spiked with anticipation for something new and transformative. Just good vibes all around.

6. St. Patrick’s Day

A true day of debauchery if you’re young and well, if you’re old too. St. Patrick’s Day is like the airport, you can drink whenever and no one bats an eye.

5. Your Birthday

This is a layup. Who doesn’t love their own birthday? Well besides Jehovah’s Witnesses. Everyone else though? A magical day.

4. Oktoberfest

A whole 16 days dedicated to beer? And meat? Sure, the Germans haven’t always been cool, but maybe they’re more chill than we initially thought.

3. Thanksgiving

If you forget the colonial connotations, it’s a great time for a family to all get together and argue about stuff, with lots and lots of food.

2. Halloween

You get to dress up. You get candy. You get a bunch of adults partying while kids have a blast too. What’s better?

1. Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa

This is now more a celebration of a time of year than anything to do with religion, but name a more magical, whimsical be-with-your-family time? You can’t. Also, snow for some people, and so many gifts!

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